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During Matthew McConaughey's acceptance speech at The Oscars, he made an interesting observation: "It's scientifically proven, "he beamed from the podium, "that gratitude reciprocates". The Oscars are all about giving thanks and acknowledging others. Easy, it may seem, for McConaughey to extol the virtues of being grateful from his exalted position. But we all know people who appear to "have it all" and are perpetually dissatisfied. And what about others who are dealing with great difficulty and have a sunny outlook? In my experience as a Wellness Coach people are either "glass half full" or "glass half empty" personalities, either optimistic in their general outlook or pessimistic: Circumstance is not the determining factor, something else is at play.
The deceptively simple image of the glass elegantly illustrates the philosophical chasm between opposing world-views. And this is no frivolous matter. Which view we adopt (and it is a choice) affects everything. Change your mindset and you change your surroundings: This concept of choice is dramatically illustrated in the 1997 Oscar-winning Italian comedy-drama, “Life is Beautiful”: Benigni plays Guido, a Jewish Italian book shop owner, who makes the choice to employ his fertile imagination to shield his son from the horrors of the Nazi concentration camp. In the camp, Guido conceals their true situation from his son by turning their lives into a complicated game in which Joshua must perform tasks that turn into points to help him win the game. Guido’s choice of outlook enables him to persuade an understandably often-reluctant Joshua to keep trying in the face of impossible odds. And the child survives while many others die.
Being grateful for what we have affirms that there are good things outside of ourselves that come to us: The world is a benevolent place providing us with what we need. Considering that what we pay attention to increases, focusing on what is missing attracts more of what is missing: The subliminal message here being, the world is a randomly hostile place out to get us.
In the 2013 documentary film “The Revolutionary Optimists” (currently airing on PBS), children are saving lives in the slums of Kolkata in India. At the center of the story we see community leader and teacher, Amlan working with slum children in a neighborhood so poor it doesn’t even appear on the map. Rather than simply helping them, he empowers them to become agents of change. He does this by challenging the mindset that marginalization is written into their destiny. Filmed over three years, the children battle poverty and transform their neighborhoods with amazing results. Focusing on what is possible is dramatically empowering under even the most impossible of circumstances.
Shifting your mindset is spiritual rocket fuel and is essential for navigating life with inner elegance. Being in the reciprocal flow of gratitude is quite simply better for us! Feeling nurtured by a benevolent world is a great stress reliever. The less stress we have the healthier we are in mind, body and spirit. And it's a great tool for strengthening relationships and communities: People are always drawn to a positive vibe.
Where I live in the Berkshire region we have the perfect place to practice our gratitude skills: It's almost impossible not to feel blessed, embraced as we are by the beauty and bounty of our special surroundings. Even then its not always possible to feel the gratitude if we are entangled in a difficult situation or dealing with personal tragedy. One thing I have noticed about people who are really adept at seeing the bright side is that they put their current difficulties down to learning a life lesson so that they can assist others with their experience. Once the difficulty is viewed as an opportunity for growth and knowledge it’s much easier to make sense of it. The problem has a purpose rather than being just an obstacle thrown in the path.
If you are experiencing difficulties about being grateful start your gratitude -journey by being thankful for the little things first: Fresh air, clean water, good food. And tonight when you lay your head on your pillow, count blessings not sheep - although in New England the spring lambs will serve you just as well!